


From the Dark to the Break of Dawn

by redblueunderoos



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Friendship, Gen, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Protective Steve Rogers, au where all the avengers live in the tower as one big chaotic family, by far the softest thing ive written, too much fluff?, too soft??
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-15
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 19:55:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23662705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redblueunderoos/pseuds/redblueunderoos
Summary: requested on tumblr by anon: Could I get Bucky feeling like he's a terrible person but with Cap comforting him n telling him he's forgiven?One-shot; Bucky's hurting, but Steve is there to help.
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes & Steve Rogers
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	From the Dark to the Break of Dawn

Cap found him sitting by the window of the tower in the pale light of morning, cross-legged on the floor, hands clenched in tight fists.

His heart broke a little at the sight. He didn’t need to press to know what Bucky was thinking. That his guilt and spiraling thoughts had plagued him into sleeplessness.

Steve made a quick detour to the kitchen to brew two cups of coffee before carrying them to the window where Bucky sat, padding softly across the floor in the Iron Man socks Tony gifted him that he swore he’d never wear.

Bucky looked up as Steve sat on the floor with him and offered him a steaming mug. He gave Steve a soft smile and took it from him.

“You, uh--“ he began.

“Yeah, yeah. Extra cream, extra sugar. How could I forget? You think I don’t know it was you who always stole the last sugar cube out of mom’s sugar dish,” Steve said, shooting him a grin. 

“Hey, pal, I needed the extra energy to look out for your sorry ass,” Bucky shot back good-naturedly.

The two sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes, taking in the twinkling daybreak of a New York Tuesday morning.

Bucky held his mug close, breathing in the steam and letting the warmth fill him. The heat soothed the half-moon imprints his clenched fist had left in his right palm.

But it wasn’t long before the anxiety and guilt kept creeping back in, unwanted, but just as fierce and insidious as ever.

Bucky could feel himself slip further from the grounding heat of his coffee, as bitter thoughts took over his thinking.

How could he just sit here when he was an awful person? He didn’t deserve to sit here and enjoy the morning sun with Steve. He didn’t deserve to enjoy anything. What did it matter that he was brainwashed? He did those things.  
“It wasn’t your fault, you know.” Steve’s voice broke through his thoughts.

Bucky swallowed thickly, choosing to stare intently at the swirling steam from his mug rather than meet Steve’s eyes.

“Yeah, but I did it.”

“Buck,” Steve reproached softly, grabbing his right hand and prying it out of the fist Bucky hadn’t even noticed he’d been making again. Steve brushed a finger over the red half-moon crevices that had re-appeared. “You’re hurting yourself.”

“Doesn’t hurt,” Bucky replied hoarsely.

Steve looked at him pointedly. “You know what I mean.” He sounded pained. “You can’t keep beating yourself up. You are not a bad person. Bad things happened to you and bad things happened around you, but you are not bad.”

“Tony’s forgiven you. The Avengers have forgiven you. Hell, the whole UN has has forgiven you. The only person left to forgive you, is you. You are forgiven, Buck.”

Steve gripped Bucky’s right hand with more force. “These two hands are just as capable of doing so much good in the world as everything they did before. More so even. With your brain half-erased by Hydra, you rescued me from the Hudson. You’re a good man, Bucky. Nothing changes that.”

Bucky’s eyes finally met Steve’s. “Thanks,” he croaked, smiling softly. Steve’s words felt like a cool balm on a wound, healing and soothing. They pushed away the guilt and offered solace.

Steve knew that one conversation wouldn’t fix Bucky’s view completely. It’ll take constant reminders of his goodness to erase the lies Hydra repeated. But Steve would be there no matter how many early coffees it took. He wasn’t going anywhere.

Besides, the New York City sunrise was hard to beat.

**Author's Note:**

> hey! thanks for reading! this is my first time writing these characters together! please let me know what you think!


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